day11. wish you were here.

physically: dear family,

i miss yall so much. miss riding in the car to pick mama up from work, and moe rolling the windows down messing up my hair. i miss playing monopoly intensively with everyone. miss the constant company of friends and family. miss being surrounding by ppl that knw all aspects of me and still love me no matter what. i love yall so much and cant wait to see you, soon. :D

emotionally: dear ____,

dude, i wish you liked me as much as i like you. &&was here with me emotionally sharing the same feelings and wanting the same things for us that i do. i confessd my feeling to you now its time to get this show on the road!!!! lol.

day 10. wish we talked

umm.. im juhst gonna list some ppl on campus that are rele cool &&i wish we talked more.

Melody Smoot. this is the sweetest girl ..she's rele cool we talk a bit on fbok and in person, but i wish we hanged out more. seems like she would be a good friend.
okay, i dont knw his name but: this art student here is soooo fine. &&i wish we talked talked lol. .man i get so happy when we cross paths and he lets me look in his profolio .lol
remy: i always talk to you, but need to talk to you now about my problems!!! only one that will listen &not judge me.

i love talking to people so i wish i spoke to everyone on campus &we were mutual friends. :D
scratch that most ppl.

day 9. person i wana meet

future boyfriend,

i would love to meet you. have someone to go on adventures, hang out, tell secrets to, and juhst have to talk to in the middle of the night. sleep on the phone with. walk with. juhst enjoy to be in the presence of. someone cute of course. that would never get tired of hearing my "country" accent. enjoy doing the things i like and also expose me to things he is interested in. not playing with my heart, and being as serious with me as i am with him. someone to learn from and with. ...i am so ready to meet you. but i am not rushing you. i knw you will come introduce yourself when the time is right.

<33333 . b.

letter challenge is back.
might do a photo challenge as welll. ill keep ya postedd. with post. lol.

8. fav facebook friend

umm. i really dnt have any favorite online friends.
;but i can spend this time to write about my new ones.

well many of them are the ones that ive met on oovoo that are attending XU in the fall.

Kara: friend from California that is "heckka" crazy and cooll. really down to earth and we can relate on lots
Keenan: really cool guy from Texas.. we talk on the phone a lot too. not juhst an online [wish i cud talk to Kara; but no phone right now]
umm...
Milan: is cool &&i like chatting with her
Leland: dresses really nice.. kan tell from pics and knw i can talk to him about that sort of thing that interest me
Teron: is funny &i like talking to him
Remy: i love laughing at you and milan when yall bikker
Briana: you were one of the firstest ppl i met &&i knw we are gonna be close
..so many pppl. juhst those i was thinking of.

dear yall,

i really enjoy chatting and knw that we will have so much fun together in NOLA &&have long lasting relationships.

<3 B.

these 30 letters..

hey,

i know the objective of the letters

was to write everyday.

but somedays i never get to it.

so i will finish them all juhst not by writing

each day.

continue to read!

love yah.

day 6. letter to stranger

umm stranger [cant believe im writing a stranger] lol,

do i knw you?
do you know me?
have you sent me a letter?
have we been writing each other?
are we facebook friends?
do you read my blogg?
will this letter ever get to you?
did we go to school together?
are you a boy/girl?
when can we meet to figure out why im writing this letter? &&if you are too.then why?

..um yea. sincerely yours or not..

B

day 5. letter to dreams.

"sweet dream or beautiful nightmare" -Bee

well dreams,

    i consider you the same as my wishes. things I hope to hppn in my life. i hope you come true for me. you are my bucketlist, my future, my accomplishments, and all that i will be known for. you are my plans for my life, the stories I will tell my children and hope will come true.
     you are also the movies of my mind that i watch at night. the ones that make me cry or scream or laugh about in the morning. you are what I tell my friends about at breakfast or try to remember as i tell my family at dinner.
    i really wish more ppl dreamd. i heard someone on time in my life from life or a movie say their life was too terrible to waste time dreaming. i disagree. dreamers have all different types of lives and circumstances but still find the time because it lifts their spirits or really makes ppl believe they have something to live for. their dreams. which will come true. <33 :)

dueces,

B

day 4. letter to my brothers.

malik,

i love you so much. you are always telling jokes and burning making the house so funn to be in. i always miss you when you go away on a trip or something. you're 14 now&i really see you as a young man &am proud of all the accomplishments you have made. i know you will do great things in your life and i cant wait to see them all take place. love you lots.

zontre,

you and i argue more than anyone else in the house, because you truly have all the same qualities that i do& most of them tend to clash with the other ones. i know you will also do great things in your life. i will also try to deal with you more, lol. without the arguing and fighting. love you.

day 3. letter to my parents.

mother: vickie elaine stevenson-sparks aka mama
father: sean anthony city aka daddy
step-father: maurise alphonso sparks aka moe

p a r e n t s

1. man and woman that had sex to produce you

2. man&woman that raise you&provide for you

3. two people you cannot stand but have

to deal with, &love without completely knowing why.

dear mama,

    you do so many things that do not completely understand, but i do love you. we never really get to have heart to heart talks because you always have something more important to occupy your time than me. i know that you do love me. juhst wish we did more mother daughter things. i know you will miss me when i leave for college&im going to miss you so much also. Moe says you are the only bestfriend i need or the only one i have something like that, because you do things for me that no one else will . i know our relationship will grow more and more as i mature and as you let me and know that i am maturing. you have been there for me and my brothers for so long without anyone else, and did everything on your own for so long, i am so proud to have you as a mom. ilysomuch. :)

dear daddy [funny how the little girl in me still calls you daddy, although the only part of the parent

definition you fit under is having sex with mama],

     actually in your letter i am not going to completely bash you, because for about 9 years of my life, you were there for me. &you and mama cared about my wellbeing enough not to really let me in on the disfunctional-ness of yuur relationship. i always loved being with you and hanging out. i loved going to detroit to visit your side of the family [that my mama absolutely hated]. but you pretty much disappeared i mean like at least two years after you left you sent us things, called, and came to visit. but then after that you completed left. YOU JUST SENT YOUR FIRST CHILDSUPPORT PAYMENT THIS WEEK. pathetic. my mother really doesnt worry about it like she should because she says its in god's hands and he provides for us. not you. i really dnt understand that about you. like somewhere in your head and/or heart you should think hey i have children that need clothes, food, and shelter. what if my mother wasnt doing well? and we couldnt rely on her? what then. you dnt care couldnt be caring. ...jerk. i really dnt care tho. some ppl with deadbeat dads spend their lives crying and worrying about it. i dnt have the time. dont call us, when we're rich b****. lmao.

moe [i never call you pop, stepdad, or anything like that, juhst weird i guess],

   you are cool, for like 80% of the time, but there is a 20% when your controlling, overprotective, and juhst plain crazy. i will never understand that 20% but its cool .glad to have you around and thanks for all the help you have given us. my mother really loves you, and i am amazed you have dealth with us for these 4 years.

day 2. letter to crush.

crushes. boys i have liked that havent like me back. :(

but i will survive! lol.

haha russell gramberry,

for a good laugh ima start with you.

when i like you, you still had hair but was confused on what to do with it

your funny and have the cutest smille.

i like you..but that was it a LIKE nothing serious.

i still love you [as a friend] to this day. &am okay to keep it

that way.

john wallace,

ima back track&go to you.

i had a crush on you since 4th grade in mscole class.

all the way to middle school.

even during my boyfriendship with robert wade.

you have the prettiest smile&eyes. that made me melt. teehee.

i almost cried when you got married to another girl under the jungle gym.

that's prolly why i pushed her off the swing.

okay, back to high school&

daniel james garrett,

boy i have liked you for too long.

make myself tired thinking of it.

you like white chicks.

we all have figured this out.

but why do you have to be sooo cute? &dress so well?

so many times i gave up, and decided to juhst be okay with being friends

but you would do something to confuse me.

guess it was juhst plain flirting without any intent;

i remember in mshandy's creative writing class

 we always sat together in class&in the computer lab

mshandy even askd if we had something, but outside i said NO. inside saying I WISH!

lol. looking back, man i wanted you bad.

hhaha. goodtimes.

sarah w. would always joke to me, about "yo man" haha

man..daniel james garrett. i could go on and on. revealing the inner secrets of

my heart, but my hands cannot even type it all. followers cannot even read it all.

my heart cannot even pour it all.

to end it all. i have decided that being your friend that you can come to

is better than not having you in my life at all. so glad i met you.

ilyboy. :)

justin claybrooks,
yeah. you boy.
i had a crush on your swag&personality.
but your such a womanizer. i need it would be nothing but a crush.
&the fact. you cant stand me.
but still had a crush on your pretty eyes. &how you could make a laugh
all the time from the crazy things you did.
i am really gonna miss sitting by you in the cafeteria in the morning
laughing with everyone from how crazy you are.
you cute.. all that. haha.
yuur head finna get so big.
but you need learn how to treat a lady.

side note: problem with cute boys they think they dnt have to be as
polite as ugly ones to get chicks.
they really dont but still try to be.

okay back to you. love you boy.

ATTN ALL OTHER BOYS:

if you name was not listed about i really did not like you that much. juhst thought you were cute.

or you had someother problem. or on a better note.

something actually hppnd between us. :)

thats not bad though. haha. try harder.

day 1. letter to yuur bestie.

im starting these letters. [inspired by netta, sandi, &&shelby]

bestfriend,

wish i knw who you were or better yet wish we found each other. someone to share secrets with, have insiders, and wear bff necklaces from Claire's with. i never really had a bestfriend. the closest i got was in kindergarten, Natasha. i loved kindergarten because no one discriminated; we were all the same. even the same color. Natasha was white, but i rele ddnt knw and/or care. elementary school you were no where to be found. then in middle school i had a little clique with Lakeia and Mariah. [funny like im saying names as if you knw.] but they were already bestfriends although i knew them since elementary. then that group grew to adding Tyresha and Latisha; who were also already attached. sooo....it was like i was stuck btwn to groups of bff's. umm. middle school you were no where to be found. in high school, looking for friends, acceptance, all that jazz. i became friends with a posse' [lmao] DO6 &hated for it. but like always they were already best of friends. &;even when one was made at one they still had 3 more girls to talk to about it. so i can say; high school you were really no where to be found.  but i did find some wonderful friends [you knw who you are] that i could ask for. they are the closest i have been to besties and i will always cherish our friendship . ilyall. :)

but luckily in college in the process of learning even more about myself. .. i will find you. &you will be a handsome young man with a great career in the future [marriage material] heyy. he's gotta be my bestfriend too. :)